How to Graduate: a Step by Step Guide

As many of us reach the end of our seemingly endless childhood and prepare to journey into the unknown depths of what can simply be known as adulthood, we can often be scared of the idea of change. This change, unlike any before, is often seen as our first step towards true independence. For some, it’s a leap of faith that requires you to step away from the life that you know, trading test scores and university applications for a ticket to a place far from home. For others, it might just be a change in scenery with new responsibilities in a familiar place. Wherever the destination, graduation is the biggest transition and challenge that we have ever faced. In times like this, we can feel lost at the sight of an unclear future or sad at the thought of the heartbreaking goodbyes, which is why it’s important that we learn to accept and deal with this critical change with an optimistic attitude and be equipped with the necessary tools to maintain a healthy wellbeing and mental health.

Firstly, it’s perfectly normal to feel the mixed emotions that one might feel with the beginning of a new chapter in life. We might feel panicked at the idea of losing our support circle or feel helpless without the familiar faces that we’ve known our whole lives. However, it’s important to realise that you and your friends don’t have to lose contact regardless of the different destinations you may have. Many people maintain their high school relationships all the way through life, especially since our world is becoming more and more digitized and maintaining contact is becoming much easier. At this rate, it might just be harder to not maintain your high school relationships. If you’re worried, you should try to actively engage and contact your friends and family to ensure you don’t lose your support circle before you can properly settle into your new life. If you’re actively putting effort in maintaining your relationships, you will have built a strong network of friends that can support you when you feel isolated and lonely in an unfamiliar environment as well as help you in the future whenever possible.

Of course, there are some circumstances that may make staying friends difficult. Depending on the circumstance, the better option may just be to look forward and move on because If we linger on the past too much and constantly compare our new environment to our old ones, we might fail to appreciate and enjoy what is currently there. This kind of thinking can lead to the development of negative thought patterns that may affect our mental health in an undesirable way, increasing the risk to certain mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety. To deal with this transition, you should try and maintain contact with your friends whenever possible, but also know when to accept certain scenarios where staying friends may be difficult and adjust to the situation to ensure that you can transition healthily to the next stage of your life.

The next stage of your life is the bridge between childhood and young adolescence. Looking at this future can be filled with a lot of uncertainty for individuals our age who are still experimenting and searching for careers or goals to work towards. People may feel anxiety and pressure from the expectation to “get their lives together” with this step into adulthood. This expectation could be created by your own subconscious or be influenced by the people around you, often causing a lot of distress and self criticism due to the pressure of keeping up with others our age. For those who are experiencing these kinds of thoughts, I want to tell you that there isn’t an expectation to suddenly get your life together right after you graduate high school. Many people don’t know exactly what they want to be or what subject they want to study which is completely normal. You’re not disadvantaged compared to people who have worked out the next twenty five years of their lives and even if you’re taking a certain undergraduate course for the next couple of years, you might find yourself working at a completely unrelated job in the near future. Finding a passion and locating the right path is a continuous journey which can take a lifetime to accomplish. Life is unpredictable and changing your goals and interests is an action that can be taken at any point in time as long as you have the resilience to get up and try again.

To ensure that you’re ready to take this step forward, there are some mental and physical preparations you can try in order to avoid panic and stress when faced with unfamiliar situations in the future. Many of us have been focused on school and learning for the majority of our lives, often missing key independent life skills such as cooking proper meals (cup noodles don’t count) or doing the laundry. While this may not be the case for everyone, it's perfectly normal for people our age to be inexperienced in the “independence” aspect of life. If you’re worried about not having the correct skills, it’s never too late to start developing now. An easy way to learn about these skills is through communicating with the people who have done it all before- your parents. This way, if you’ve learnt the basics of what it truly takes to live away from home, you’ll be more prepared and calm in future situations. Aside from learning the physical skills, this also helps build your inner confidence and makes you feel more mature when you’re capable of doing key things without the help of others.

Lastly, you should talk with university students or friends who have just made the same transition you’re about to. A lot of the time, we don’t know what to expect and how we’re going to settle which makes us scared. If university students can share their own experiences with you, you might feel more at ease with what's to come and feel more excited for the next few years of your life. I hope this guide has been somewhat useful to those who are feeling uneasy about graduation and I wish you all the very best for your future endeavors!